This is further to a recent blog I wrote pointing out that life’s a gamble, an additional observation from the sofa and a diet of daytime TV.
Blimey, if there’s anything worse than being told to rest up and being forbidden to drive after a medical procedure, it’s being told what to do with our own money. The sceptre is there that before long, unless we delve into the murky world of illegal bookmakers, some of us will be protected from ourselves, our punting business no longer wanted by responsible layers.
It’s a nightmare scenario for those of us who often wonder where people who don’t bet get their daily dose of excitement that only a head-bobber can give.
It’s OK though, there are opportunities to do your dough throughout every weekday morning. Some of it is in absolute cold blood, others rather more wholesome. The best thing about all of them is that as far as I can see, there’s nobody going to meddle with your matters and not let you have a pop.
First up, and it’s Good Morning Britain on ITV. This will suit those of you who have been restricted from bookmaker’s casinos, oh hang on, anyway, it goes like this. I haven’t counted how many times, but quite a few, the well-muscled Andi Peters will pop up and ask you how you’d spend the million quid you can win by taking part in the draw.
It’s a million at the time of writing, other sums are available during the year. There’s a multitude of ways of entering including on your phone. You get some free goes if you have enough attempts and don’t have to pull it up until your phone bill comes.
If you’ve not reached your limit and are staying tuned into the personable Lorraine, This Morning or Loose Women you’ll be invited to have other goes at winning the million quid on each show. It’s very tempting for a couple of quid on your phone bill. There doesn’t seem to be any info on the number of people who have entered so far which of course affects the odds of winning, but it’s only £2 a go and you have to be in it to win it and someone’s got to. Good luck if you are in. I should also point out that you can also enter for the price of a stamp if you are looking for the value and have read the small print.
Over on the BBC a favourite of yours truly is Homes Under The Hammer. For those of you who are gainfully employed, you might not be familiar with the long-running program, so here’s how it works. This would suit the bigger punters who like to lump it on. Presenters show us around largely dilapidated houses that are being sold as seen at auction. People bid then we are introduced to new owners who tell us their plans for the building.
Later on in the show we see the transformations and hear from Estate agents who tell us all how much has been made by the industrious purchasers.
We are spared the blood, sweat and tears that must have been shed in between the two visits. We know there had been though because the purchaser has often aged considerably between telling us their budget of £20,000 and two month time scale, not least because we are meeting them a year later and £10,000 more than expected.
It does seem that the rewards are there, not bad bets at all. There’s even better news for us gamblers that maybe won’t be allowed to gamble any more.
It appears that as long as you can pull up the readies there’s nobody there waiting in the wings to save you from yourselves. If you have £50,000 you can still buy mid-terrace somewhere nobody wants to live. A place with no roof and subsidence you didn’t know about because you didn’t view the house or read the legal pack but thought it looked like value. The professionals make it look easy while the first time developers sometimes suffer, sounds familiar.
Oh, then there’s Bargain Hunt. I’d quite fancy going on that myself. You have to wander around an antique fair with an expert to guide you. The task is simple, find something that has been undervalued by professional traders, buy it, then sell for more than you paid for it at auction. Hold on, isn’t that what they’d call dirty arbing in the gambling game that we used to love? This is even better, you do it with someone else’s money and keep the profit.
I have a feeling that you have to prove that you are pretty clueless at antiques to get on the show. But here’s where it could get exciting, how about you draft in an antiques expert as your partner, hide his form at the entry stage then go all in when he spots a rick in the market? It would just be a case of the scenic route to the winner’s enclosure and making our way to the payout and if all went well a ‘Golden Gavel’ to boot Now that would be fun.
Any antique shewdies who fancy a touch, WhatsApp me.
Views of authors do not necessarily represent views of Star Sports Bookmakers.
Simon Nott is author of: Skint Mob! Tales from the Betting Ring
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